I might weigh in on the sexual politics of shaving later, but right now, I have a little story about the practicalities of hair removal in delicate areas.
My wife keeps it cleaned up downstairs, if you know what I mean, so one day I decided to return the favor.
Early one evening, I went into the bathroom, pulled out my hairy nutsac and surveyed it. I concluded immediately that hitting it with the razor first wasn't too smart - some of those hairs are long. So, I searched for a scissors for an initial trim. I'm sure that my wife has a full grooming set somewhere, but I wanted this to be a surprise, so I didn't ask her where she kept it. On my own, I was only able to find a sewing scissors, about 8" long, with orange handles ("Fiskars" brand, for those interested in meaningless detail). Though unweildy, they were razor-sharp.
I grabbed a hank of nutsac-hair and snipped it off with the mighty Fiskars. So far so good. I repeated this process a few times and I must confess that I began to get a bit careless. I should also note that it is extremely difficult to trim the bottom of one's nutsac, unless you're a contortionist. Having the flexibility of a steel I-beam, I really was having a hard time bending far enough to see what I was cutting.
The first indication that I had cut things a little too close was that the hair falling from my sac stuck together. The second indication was a sharp pain. Yes, I had snipped some of the skin of my nutsac along with the hair. Though it was a pretty small amount of skin, it did bleed rather profusely. On the plus side, however, those Swedes do make good scissors, and the wound was very neat - no jagged edges.
At that point I had two problems. First, there was still plenty of hair on the old sac, and though it would have been easy to apply a band-aid, removing it would probably have to be accomplished under general anaesthetic. Second, what the hell was I going to tell my wife?
Well, I addressed the first issue by stuffing my shorts with toilet paper. As for the second, when I told her about my mishap, she said: "Oh, I like it hairy down there anyway. I wouldn't like it if you shaved."
